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#umberdove

I see me in you...

   your warm, brown eyes,

       twinkling with the promise of new discovery,

                 craving contact with the flying angels that surround us,

                           but often ignored when 'life' becomes busy and rushed.



I see me in you...

      your calloused, stained fingertips,

             itching to bring to life your latest discovery,

                    about how life is a series of cycles endlessly looping,

                          and bringing new perspectives with each level of understanding.


I see me in you....

         your open and gregarious nature,

               eager to share your discoveries with others,

                      about how we are all connected, and that time

                             is a precious commodity that demands attention and gratitude.


I see me in you...

          your wide, natural smile,

                eager to express your love for others,

                      about how we are all living light and that love
             
                            is the glue that holds us all together in this blue orb

                                   called home.


                   Soar, Dove, Soar....and thank you for showing us how to fly true.


Kelly Clark had that rare ability to reflect back to us the best in ourselves...to show us what our own potentiality can be. 




         

Pretty, Shiny Things

I started making jewelry again this week after yet another set-back. I found myself in the Emergency Room a couple of weeks ago with severe chest pain.

I was nervous about it having something to do with the surgery, but it looks like it was a recurrence of an old chest injury I did to myself last year after helping Shayne lift up some sheet rock.

The Emergency room doctor thought a virus could also be responsible but we will never really know. I feel pretty sure that it came about because I started feeling my oats and bit off a lot more than I should have chewed...I know that it was debilitating and disheartening.

I still have limited energy to do much, and on the days that I have to work even a short shift, I conserve my energy so that I can be vibrant and helpful while I am working. I have had alternating periods of feeling really frustrated, to just giving in to the way I feel and resting if I need to. Mom said it would be 6 months before I really feel like myself again, and I believe her now that I am almost 3 months post surgery.

This summer I have busied myself making areas for sitting and resting much more cozy and beautiful since that has been my focus. My front porch is now a little bird sanctuary where I can drink my coffee and watch the sweet winged ones come and go, squabbling and chattering, whistling and chirping to me, the neighborhood cats and each other. I am discovering the personality of my land...the little ones that inhabit this 1/2 acre are extensions of my family now...and I have a morning routine where I feed and water the birds, and take down raw peanuts and corn for my neighborhood crows.

I am fascinated by corvids...always have been. They are so smart...and devoted to their family. I call out, "Hey Crow-Babies," and they are usually waiting for me to appear with their morning treats down on our second tier. I love that they no longer fly away when they see me coming, and watch me spread out their morning feed on the ground. I bought a pretty, shiny silver scoop that carries their food down the hill. From what I've read, it is largely a myth that crows collect and hoard shiny things, but I am hoping they associate that bright scoop with me carrying it as a friendly sign.

I have a serene screened porch, almost like a treehouse, that has needed some loving care in the furniture department, so I bought some deep seated chairs and an ottoman for ultimate comfort. Shayne and I will enjoy sitting out there during all the weather changes...I am truly living a dreamy existence with my living space merging into my yard.

I have the day off today and plan on making jewelry for at least half of it. I'm still being patient with myself,  holding myself back a bit so that I can continue to make progress without any setbacks. I am finding I have energy for just one thing a day...working at the store, or working at home. But not both yet. Still have to work up to that...and nap when necessary.

My neighbor had a birthday while I was recuperating and I made her these simple, shiny hoop earrings. I love them...pretty, shiny things have never been as important to me as they are now. But shiny is typically associated with newness. I am looking at my world with fresh eyes, looking for new opportunities for connecting with others as well as myself. I think that is the emphasis for me this year...freshness and consciously creating a supportive and thriving environment for me as well as those that find themselves in my company.

I am very behind with my accounts and updating my shop. I am hopeful that will soon be remedied.



How to get a full night's sleep

Do you suffer from lack of sleep due to a racing mind?

As you may recall, I decided about 6 months ago to take on a part-time position with a local health food store, and it has turned out to be one of the best decisions I could have made because of all the great information and people I am exposed to weekly.

I enter into many conversations with customers about problems sleeping because 'their minds won't turn off' and the incessant loops of thoughts keep them up at night, or, they can fall asleep, but they wake up with this loop of thoughts preventing them from going back to sleep.

We all have thousands of thoughts moving through our minds daily...some of them are really mundane, while others are profound.

I've found that if you are not pulling out the mundane thoughts, like unwanted and scraggly weeds, your thought-garden gets too clogged up to allow the profound and life-enhancing thoughts any room to grow and go to seed.

But how?

One method that works for me is dumping what I hear in my head on paper for about 25 minutes and then throwing the paper away.

What do I mean by dumping what I hear in my head?

Literally, for 20 or 25 minutes, I sit at my dining room table with a pad and pen, and write down what I 'hear' going on in my head. I don't judge the words, I don't try and think about what I am writing. I just get out the random thoughts.

If I am nervous or tense about something, I usually do this exercise at night before I turn in.

For example:

Did my heart just skip a beat? Is that ok? What do I need to make for Cam's next dinner so that she doesn't have to worry about cooking while she is getting to know her new baby? What can I use instead of aluminum foil so she can reheat a Mexican casserole in the oven? What can I do to get rid of the hundreds of curly worms in the basement? Does that weird smell in the basement have anything to do with the worm bin? Did Shayne feed the worms this week? Do I need to let him know where to plant the new Hydrangia? Do I need to tell him how deep to dig the hole? Should we amend the soil? 

And this goes on and on for 20 more minutes as you watch where your mind goes, and what is it is currently preoccupied with. I usually crumple up the paper after I am done and just throw it away.

Sometimes a question or observation will pop up that needs more attention, but usually the stuff I am worried about, or that is on my mind, are things that will be taken care of when the present moment has the energy and inclination to deal with it.

Once those thoughts that keep you up at night are weeded out of your mind, you can sleep.

The looping happens because you are habitually thinking about things that you most likely have no control over in the middle of the night, and they just need to be pulled out and briefly examined.

I often find that the answers to my looping thoughts will quickly come up to the surface once I give them a little life on the page.

I believe it has something to do with acknowledging them...like a little kid that is constantly trying to get your attention. Once you acknowledge the thoughts...they quieten down and stop aggravating you to tend to them.

Over the years, with this practice, I have noticed a profound peace as it pertains to the chatter in my mind. By pulling out the weedy thoughts, I have developed a sense of trust that the answers to my questions will be answered when the time is right.

Now I trust I will know what to do when the situation that I am worried about actually shows up in my physical experience.

This also helps you cultivate within yourself a deep sense of patience. With patience, trust in the natural flow of life happens naturally and your mind relaxes and stops provoking you to pay attention to it.

When I first started experiencing long periods of time where the voice in my head was quiet, it was startling. It happened rather spontaneously about 5 years ago.

I remember calling my brother wondering whether or not I was beginning to experience dementia. The chatter in my head was silent!

When I was living in Chattanooga, I was first introduced to this practice of writing down what you hear in your head and leaving it on the page.

After doing it for a while, I noticed that my sense of worry about the future diminished greatly, and I was able to focus on what was immediately in front of me instead of projecting thoughts into the future.

By remaining present, and focusing on what is immediately in front of me, my future has taken care of itself, and I find that I am for the most part, happy and content with a sense of deep fulfillment. I laugh a lot, and feel much more grounded.

If you are plagued with a mind that likes to poke you while you try and sleep, I hope that this little exercise helps you get your sleep back...stay with it and watch what happens!