Family Secrets

I just finished watching My Mom Jayne, the story of Mariska Hargitay's mother, Jayne Mansfield. It was a wonderful documentary, and it brought to mind a personal family secret that I wasn't aware of until about 8 years ago.

There's a very real possibility that I have a half-brother out there somewhere.

I'm not going to get into the specifics of the story because it's not mine to tell, but when I found out it really did change my view of myself and the story of my family.

My father was heartbroken to think he had a son that he didn't know about until he was in his mid-70s. It really rocked his world, and before he died, I asked him about it.

And he told me that every day since he found out, he prayed he would find him.

Evidently, my half-brother was adopted at birth, without any hope of finding out who adopted him and where he ended up. We didn't even know if he was still alive.

Dad did a genetic test via one of those companies that connect people via DNA analysis, in case he was still alive, and wanted to find out more about his birth parents.

There were no matches.

In many families, since the possibility of DNA matches has become possible, many family secrets are no longer such a secret.

I know of a few people quite close to me who have been down the road of finding out they have siblings out there somewhere, and the possibilities of reunification always seemed to be full of excitement.

I'd like to believe that I would be excited too, but I think that's one of those emotions that you don't know how you really feel unless it happens to you.

The older I get, the more I realize that my emotional reactions to things don't often pan out like movies or books portray.

I will say, however, that I love to people-watch more now than I did before I found out that I may have a half-brother out there somewhere. And I wonder, a lot actually, why this information made its way to us the way it did?

What's the purpose of a dead end? I guess I will either find out one day, or not.

But it does make me wonder.

If you get the opportunity, watch My Mom Jayne. on MAX. Mariska did a fantastic job of putting many puzzle pieces together of her life, along with her mother's, and presenting us with a beautiful mosaic of love in its many forms.